Why I chose not to take anti-depressants
Sitting on the couch I had come to appreciate at my psychologist's office, I remember her telling me how my body reacts to stress. I hadn’t been myself, I felt lost and my body was constantly in pain. “Sometimes”, she said, “medication is necessary to just bring stability.” I listened and nodded as I had done over the weeks, it made sense and I agreed with her; after all, everything had taken a toll on me. I was tired all the time for lack of sleep, and ailments of all kinds from ear and throat infections, ovarian cysts, ulcers, persisting coughs, and colds not only plagued my body for months but also increased anxiety. She explained that loss was different from any other type of mental health problem because it could come unexpectedly in different degrees, triggered by the most unusual things. For me, having woken up about six times at night to help my mother to the bathroom, anxiety would kick in around the time when she would’ve woken me up, only this time, she w